After updating my iphone to iOS 13.2 iTunes was not showing my device.  Normally there’s a popup that states a software update must be downloaded, but it was not showing up on my old High Sierra iTunes 12.8.2.3.  To fix that follow the following directions:

In Finder
Go -> Go to Folder
Then type in
/System/Library/PrivateFrameworks/MobileDevice.framework/Versions/Current/Resources

Double click MobileDeviceUpdater


Source:
https://discussions.apple.com/thread/250624460